The Haves and the Have Nots: Making Millions (4x06)

The episode starts with Hanna picking Q up off the bench and running to the hospital. First off, it seems as if the bench and the hospital were like 36 feet from each other so I don't know why Hanna was just on the bench when she could have walked him there instead of being all dramatic. This is obviously Tyler Perry so there's a good chance Hanna just decided to become Wonder Women and ran 36 miles to get to the hospital. Regardless, she gets him there. The doctor comes out and tells her that he has Lupus, and asthma (far better than what I thought: I thought he was going through withdrawal because Quita was feeding him crack in his cereal or something). He needs to be in a clean environment, not that damn MO-tel she had him staying at (I say motel because Hanna knows damn well the only "ho" in that tel are the prostitutes staying next door). The meds are very expensive so Hanna is basically fucked - I don't even know how she's going to scrape through these medical bills considering her bosses are in jail (which she doesn't know).

Mitch the Bitch is back from a job and is starting to get pissed off that Benny seemingly has him there just so he can do all the work while Benny gets to chill. Clearly, that's not the case because Benny is gathering all the necessary supplies (that he probably got watching Breaking Bad) to dispose of the cadaver. They get into a bit of a heated argument before Bitch Mitch lets him go on his way to take care of his business. He gets to Candace's place and when she comes home he's scrubbing the place down with Bleach and tells her that Quincy is buried in the backyard because the old white lady across the street has cameras fixed on her front door so there is no way of getting his body out without being spotted doing something suspicious so this is their best bet. As she continues to ask him questions, Benny is visibly getting angrier and angrier at his sister, rightfully so. He's been begging her to get out of all this messy crap and he's currently burying a dead body for her. Speaking of that nosy bitch, she spots Jeffery outside of Candace's house and attempts to scold him because there's "way too much action" going on inside that house asking if she's a "lady of the night."

As I said last week, Candace may love Benny but he's far better than the brother she deserves and I think he's starting to realize that himself. He basically reads the fuck out of her after she tries to convince him to do one more thing, which he understandably believes is another scam, because she never learns from her mistakes and it's one mistake after another. He. Just. Buried. Someone. For. Her. But it turns out that this is actually legit. She hits two birds with one stone. She gets him back on her side and she turns him against his mother, claiming that Hanna knew that Wyatt was the one to hit him. Bitch, no she didn't. NO SHE DID NOT.? OMFG. I personally would be fine with Wyatt getting his spoiled, bitch ass beat but that's because I'm petty.

Warlock's musty, knob-necked ass shows up at Candace's house because he wants money. He wants $$$$$$$$. She tries to buy some time for herself by telling him that her and Benny are about to come into millions of dollars by suing the Cryers but he's only giving her a week. Basically, everyone is sick of Candace's shit and I can't really blame them. Oh yeah, also, they take a shower together? I guess...they have sex? I don't know?? Gross????? I don't even wanna think about that.

Wyatt is so high he might as well be a plane at this point, and the fact that Jeffery (his former sober coach) doesn't get that just proves how useful he was back in the beginning of the show. Herpes (Jennifer) calls Wyatt and lets him know that his drug test (that he faked) came back clean and his mom is getting out soon so he should get out of the house right after he gets his inheritance. Doesn't Wyatt only have 12 million dollars in his inheritance? If he buys that car, gets a private jet, takes that trip to Brazil (for the women, apparently - even though Jeffery is about as straight as curly fries) he will be out of that money by the end of the week. Wyatt is so stupid, I can't stand his ignorant ass. It's funny how every other thing out of his mouth is calling Jeffery a bitch, or telling him how he's not really even important to him. I'm sure it's the drugs and the fact that he's such an idiot is the main reason behind it but Wyatt would probably drop him like a hot stone in a second for something better and the sooner Jeffery realizes it, the sooner he'll be better off.

David knows about the hit out on Veronica and refuses to let her out until he knows where she lives so he can take care of the situation. Of course, David isn't going to tell her that there's a hit out on her so he's forced to be very vague. Veronica, being extremely hard headed and delusional, refuses to believe that he will just leave her in the jail so she doesn't tell him where she lives because apparently that wig wasn't the only thing making her crazy and delusional. She even goes as far as to assume that David and Maggie are in on this together (the pictures of her sleeping with Benny in the paper) trying to make her crazy, not realizing that she is doing a perfectly nifty job of being an insane witch all by her damn self. David reminds her that in order for those pictures to have been taken, she had to have been doing something and that he is trying to help her. To which she coldly "corrects," saying that he just wants to spend more time with Maggie. Veronica continues to taunt him, lying about how she lives with her man (Benny) and David gets fed up and leaves. She's just...a piece of work. Well, a piece of cold chicken.

Oscar Brandon returns to David's office, assuming he got called in to help out with Candace again. David wants him to find out who put out the hit on Veronica. He basically gives him nothing to work with, in short, calling her a sneaky bitch. He also wants him to find out who Veronica was cheating on him with. As he gets the paper, I can't help but wonder if Oscar recognizes Benny as Candace's brother. I don't think they had a lot of interactions, but, eh drama? Oscar's reactions are hilarious as David gives him the circumstances they're going through right now - it's a testament to how ridiculous it all sounds. Mama Rose's name being the most ridiculous of them all.

"When can I come get mah cah?" Damn, it's like Quita's accent gets more reckless and abandoned as the weeks go on. DAMN. "Who got my cah?" "Wheh mah cah at?" Could you read that? Because it was damn hard to understand that when she said it. Basically, the police have Quita's car because it's what Jeffery was arrested in and they call to tell her just that. "Som'n up. Police got mah cah, and det Harrington bwoi got it?" She says in a monologue to herself before calling Daylon (Quincy Combs) to comes get her.

Oh yeah and Maggie and David finally fuck. True. OKAY DAVID. I SEE YOU. I wish I could UN-see that sex scene, but, um, cute? They didn't use protection, Maggie is fine with it because she'd love to have his baby (apparently no one would know it was his, even though she'd be finna have a black baby and everyone knows she's been lusting after him) but he swiftly shuts that down and she agrees to get the morning after pill. Unless they show her going to CVS and swallowing that pill, I am almost positive she's gonna wind up pregnant during the finale. Or maybe the episode before and then Veronica can push her down the stairs in the final seconds of the finale. DAMN THAT WOULD BE GOOD, WHERE YOU AT, TYLER PERRY?! 

EPISODE GRADE: B+

Things are finally starting to unravel! I hope we get more Katheryn next week, more Jim and Veronica fights and I'm pretty sure we're getting a bible verse, or three, from Hanna to Wyatt so that should be fun (If it's anything like "SHUT UP, DEMON. IN THE NAME OF JESUS", then we are automatically going to have our first A of the season).

-CLICK HERE for more #HAHN reviews!

-"Well? Are you gonna knock?" - Is probably going to be a new segment on these reviews, omfg.

-"I walk in the door on my knees." - Veronica Harrington, ladies and gentleman.

-"David, use me again." - I feel like we're going to get a lot more of that when Tyler finally just drives her crazy.

-I'm finally cause up with The Haves and the Have Nots, BLESS.