If Loving You Is Wrong: The Beauty That Is (2x02)

Natalie is the real friend. Despite me saying that Esperanza and Kelly are a bit on the too good friend side when it come to how they're handling the baby situation with Alex, I had to agree with Natalie when it came to not talking to Alex about the baby. Of course she needs to be reminded of her baby. First off, she just had a goddamn baby. Second of a all, she needs to know this isn't all going to just go away just by turning her face away. Last episode, she refused to see her baby in a segment I'm going to start introducing this review called "Ugh, Alex." There are so many reasons to ugh at everything Alex does but not wanting to see her baby is at the top of the list. Think about it. She is refusing to see a baby that SHE created while cheating on her HUSBAND with her BEST FRIEND (argubably, because the actresses have absolutely no chemistry as best friends)'s HUSBAND. While the best friend was, herself, trying to have her husband's baby. 

There are so many reasons to ugh at Alex. Don't get me wrong, I'm not just blaming Alex. Alex tried to break it off several times with Randal but he just kept pushing. He's just as much to blame, if not a little more, for this but we're talking about the many reasons to ugh at everything Alex does and this whole baby not looking at it nonsense is at the absolute fuck top of the list. Did anyone else cackle when Kelly looked at Natalie dead ass and told her "All babies are a blessing!" Not when Alex fucked this whole situation up like a goddamn champ. I love Kelly, but she's giving Esperanza a run for her money as dumb friend this week. Until Esperanza's fairy ass said, "You've had a baby already, you know what this is like!" Esperanza, when has Natalie experiences cheating on her husband and having a baby of another race? Hush. SHH. 

When Alex called the baby "that child" the reaction on Natalie's face was priceless as Alex told the girls she hated her own child. As Natalie told Alex to speak her truth I remember shifting from neither #TeamBrad and #TeamAlex and sailing my black ass swiftly to #TeamNatalie #TeamSliceThatNigga. When Natalie pulled out the race card, I had to take a step back though. It was part of the truth but at the same time, Alex isn't a racist. She isn't just saying all of this because he's black, granted if she cheated with a white man they could have passed it as Brad's baby, but because she knows that the baby isn't her husbands, how can she honestly try to look at him without the constant reminder that she ruined something with a great guy? All I was thinking at this point was where is Natalie's box cutter? Because I need her to slice the scene so we could get to Marcie, Randal and his crazy ass mama.

And surely enough Tyler Perry answered my prayers because immediately after, Randal is pulling up to his house where his mama stays looking tired as hell on that damn Color Purple ass porch. Really, Randal? Your phone has been dead the entire 1,192 miles your mama took to drive here? Drive. As Randal asks her why she's on the porch, Louise replies that his wife called her an old bitch. Louise, you have been an old bitch the entire time you've been to their house but let's not tell lies now. She called you "old ass." Not old bitch, but old ass. Let's keep our facts from being nappy and get them straight, yes? If she wanted to go to a damn hotel she would have gone to a hotel, Randal. This is the one time you need to shut up and let this glorious thing happen because as much as I couldn't stand Louise last episode she made for some good ass TV/banter with Marcie. Imagine if those two teamed up against Randal? The world would sink in itself. As they get in the house, Marcie comes in. As she sits on the couch calmy, she just looks at Randal. Hemmens' crazy eyes gives me LIFE. As Louise leaves to get groceries, the back and forth between her and Randal is gold, cumulating in her telling him he has "one hour to get that bitch out of here or all hell gon' break loose." All hell? Randal, you better keep your mama in the house.

Best lines: Ugh, can I just quote everything for this scene?

"Watchu been eating? Take out" I. Am. Weak.
"Son, look at your skin." When Louise mentioned his skin, I thought she was gonna call his black ass ashy.
"That's why you're son of a bitch." I repeat. I. Am. WEEK.

We're not really going to get into Alex' scene with the doctor because she is taking an emo route that I just can't handle or be bothered to discuss. At this point, Alex would ask to see the baby just so she could have a stroke and be put out of her misery...and would anyone complain? *sips tea*

Kelly's scene wasn't anywhere near relevant with the neighbor but I died laughing when she was about to shake her hand then when "mmmm no." She low key shady, on the low. She is the epitome of a nosey black neighbor, peeking in the door to see Kelly's paint job. Edwina Findley is an amazing comedic actress because everytime the neighbor spoke, you could see on her face she wanted to shade her down to her flowers that she was watering in the garden. But Findley kept the composure to Kelly's face while hinting that she wanted to shade her. ...This leads to Travis.

Kelly is such a strong woman, I love her. She took control of her situation with Travis in an amazing way. She slept with him, he thinks they're dating again and she spanks him with a: 

"yeahhh, you thought wrong." (:

Kelly is the absolute best, shutting him down at every possible angle. At least he finally acknowledged that he hurt her after being completely oblivious. Travis is such a child. It was hilarious and cringeworthy as he told her that she was leaving "them" hanging, referring to his boner. Kelly's gotcha at the end was perfect and the little montage of her at the end was priceless. Kelly is the best. Unlike Eddie, she's the best because she's actually the best.

Best quotes:

"I wanna make love."

"Yeahhh, I don't."

"It was amazing. You enjoyed it." "....Well...something was...off." *looks down at his crotch* "What's that? That a sad face?" 

"Boy take your horny ass home."

The doctor comes to Alex/Brad's house and the little girl, Paisley, opens the door and goes up to get her dad. The son tells her he's not in a good mood, which he hasn't been since the midseason premiere back in March. The doctor asking why he was in a bad mood was stupid when she knows damn well that black baby ain't his AND that he knows something is up because he begged for a DNA test. The doctor was very smart to go to Kelly, she's the most level headed of the friends and the only one who is qualified to give advice (I'm look at you, Esperanza).

This week in: Brad is a savage:
"This is none of my business." "...Yeah. Yeah, you got that correct."
"I need you to talk to her." "In order to do that, I need a drink." Brad is also the real friend.
"She's already been screwed by one therapist." Hmm.
"Are you prepared to be a single father of two children?" Paraphrased: "Bitch, whur? Which three?"

Eddie comes "home" and before she mentions it again, I forgot he got shot because he's out here running three marathons, fucking 7 bitches and shooting rookies' hands clean smooth the hell off. Who cares about Eddie's wellbeing? As Esperanza asks to see his wound, she literally just wants to see him without his shirt on. Not actually but, yeah. That's what the audience wants at least. The budget for the show is so damn low, Eddie's wound looks like Tyler Perry ran over his skin with a Tide marker and shrugged. Esperanza finally does something that makes us come even close to caring about her character. Just as she's about to clean his wound with alcohol, Esperenza pushes the gauze into his wound like she's fingering a 30 year old elephant. I absolutely lived for it, and it's some subtle character development. A year ago, she wouldn't have even spoken to Eddie about something like this, let alone stand up to him the way she did. I was proud of her in this scene and it was great to see her pull a boss move. Smacking him and telling him to get out.

Eddie is the best:

As Mica asks for the answer to a question, Esperanza said that he wouldn't just give her the answer and Eddie looked this chick dead in her face and give Mica the first, next and last answer as she went to her room. 

"Did you smoke?" "...I smoked a joint on the way here." Okay, cop.

"I'll do anything for you." Yeah, you'll kick a girl out of her own bed for her. (:
"...There's no lipstick on me anywhere..." *checks his dick for lipstick...finds some* "...Damn. Imma kill that hoe."

Ben is pointless so we're not going to spend too much time on these cops that are so dirty, the pigs have nothing left to roll around in. Ben lies about how he got shot, Lushion is too smart to buy this bull crap. But then again so would the cast of dumb and dumber because he lies like a first grader.

I feel a little for Alex as she finally takes her pills. Her and Kelly actually have a true chemistry together as friends, unlike her and Marcie which makes it uncomfortable to watch a lot of the time. But Kelly is such a good friend that even if they didn't have any chemistry they would still be a great pair. It's a rare beautiful moment when Alex finally holds the baby and Kelly is giving us an Iyanla Van Zandt monologue/voice over. 

EPISODE GRADE: B+
Next time: IT'S THE MOMENT THAT STARTED IT ALL. Next episode is the flashback to when Randal and Alex started their affair!