Disclaimer: The thoughts expressed in this post are subjective and clearly biased. I am not affiliated with ITV, X Factor or Syco! Recap of the Top 10 after the jump!
So what exactly does Divas Week mean to X Factor? To me I think of Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, and other powerful female vocalists. How exactly on God's green earth did Honey G get away with doing a Vanilla Ice song? When did we start calling Michael Jackson and Sam Smith divas? It seemed like only about half of them stuck to the actual theme. They might as well have just had another Express Yourself theme if they're just going to do whatever the heck they want. I thought it was a mind-boggling night of performances. There was one or two shockers, mostly average and one absolute joke of performances. But, damn. I wonder how it feels to have Simon Cowell call your performance terrible but give Honey G a standing ovation in the next breath. Speaking of which, it's like he's a whole new kind of bitch this season. Nicole is better than me, Simon's eyes would have been black and blue by now if he talked to me the way he talks to Nicole. By the way, Nicole's voice stole the night. Enough said.
"Rolling in the Deep"
Well that was a little numbing, wasn't it? His vocals were pretty alright for the most part but I just thought it was boring. If you caught any glimpse of the judges, especially Sharon, 75% of them just looked so ridiculously bored. It was weird because on paper, this performance had all the elements of something that should of worked. His vocals were good, his diction was much better and the arc of the song was interesting. It was really lacking emotions, though. Look, I'm just glad Ryan looks like Ryan again and not like he got left behind in the Leave it to Beaver factory.. C
"Lay Me Down"
Gifty, girl, where have you been hiding that voice this whole time? I know she had a pretty good voice this whole time but she pulled out all of the stops this week! She has a very energetic and funky vibe to her so it was great to sit back and have her take us on this emotional roller coaster. Every part of her seemed to be into the song and emotionally invested in the material at hand. I didn't know she had that in her. Her vocals were clean, clear and that key change was absolutely everything. Gifty seems to only be getting better and I'm excited to see her growing! A
"Valerie"
Okay, well it wasn't terrible. Not sure what Simon was talking about. Son, you literally stood up for Honey G about a half an hour later. Obviously there was a lot of vigorous choreography and movement so some of the vocals fell a little flat. I thought the choreography was a little cheesy, and there was a lot more dancing than singing, but overall it was a very fun performance still. I am going to keep saying this until it gets through to you. They stood up for Honey G and then got bad comments on this performance. B
"Earth Song"
I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this performance yet. I think Sam delivered it with a good amount of intensity and passion. Some of it worked for me and some of it just didn't. It was weird because her voice sounded stellar in some parts, but in other parts it seemed like the song was swallowing her a little bit. I thought something was missing, but at the same time I still think it was pretty good. B
"I'll Be There"
This performance was a bit all over the place for me. There were parts where I cringed and parts where I got goosebumps. His pitch was everywhere but on that stage with him where he needed it. He was a little off in the beginning, the second verse was beautiful and I really enjoyed his falsetto notes. Anytime he does a run I kind of lose mind, duh, he's Matt. I thought it was going fantastic but then he hit this note in the key of W (for wrong) sharp. It was kind of hard to listen to, honestly. But then he stuck the landing and ended strongly. Who cares, though. He could spit on the stage and the judges would probably stand up for him. But, boy, that was a lot. B-
"Ice Ice Baby/Under Pressure"
Okay, this wasn't as terrible as I expected it to be. Her rapping was a lot less tragic than last week, I really enjoyed the dance break. She looked like a character in Regular Show, it was so funny. But was I the only one who felt like the performance was ten minute long? I don't know why the judges keep standing up for her week after week. Like I said, it wasn't as terrible as I expected but...c'mon. It was pretty bad, haha. D+
"Natural Woman"
Was she sick this week? I could barely tell. I. Could. Barely. Tell. You could hear the flu in her voice a little but, I mean, c'mon. That was sick for a sick person. Haha. Her sick voice is 700 times better than mostly everyone else in the competition. It was a little predictable, sure, but it was still one of the best of the night. I'm gonna keep saying this every week until she stops doing it but those key changes had me on my knees praising her. B+
"How Will I Know"
Once again, I really loved the arrangement. It's kind of what I expected out of her after last week and hearing what she was doing this week. I thought the first half was really pretty but the second half left me with a bad taste in my mouth because she doesn't have the power in her voice to give it that intensity at the end. She has a very nice tone, but her voice isn't as strong as some of the others in the competition. Without the gimmicks, or upbeat style of performance, she's kind of just...there. Please give her back her trusty guitar, Simon! C+
"Lady Marmalade/Bang Bang"
They're really cute and everything but I keep expecting them to really knock it out of the park and their performances are just alright. This was kind of like Matt, where their vocals were all over the place. Unlike Matt, their track record on this show isn't clean for the most part. I was cringing at some of the notes they tried to hit. And they just stood together most of the time. No shade, but Nicole stood up, then sat right back down and it looked like Sharon just stood up to tell her to sit down. Their vocals need a lot of work and it wouldn't hurt to not be so stiff all the time. C-
"Oh So Quiet!"
THAT. WAS. SO. WEIRD PERFECT. Dear public, please like Saara Aalto. Everything about this performance was to die for. The staging was brilliant. The first time I watched it I got goosebumps, I couldn't stop smiling. There was so much happening the entire performance and I loved every second of it. It was batshit crazy. It was weird, it was different and excellent. Just like Saara. Her vocals were predictably spot on and I think she had a really great moment! "How can you use maxi pads and bananas in the same sentence?" A
RANKINGS:
10. Honey G D+ (Last week's position: #11 // -10)
09. 4 of Diamonds C- (Last week's position: #9 // +0)
08. Ryan Lawrie C (Last week's position: #8 // +0)
07. Emily Middlemas C+ (Last week's position: #7 // +0)
06. Matt Terry B- (Last week's position: #2 // -4)
05. Sam Lavery B (Last week's position: #5 // +0)
04. 5 After Midnight B (Last week's position: #1 // -3)
03. Relley C B+ (Last week's position: #3 // +0)
02. Saara Aalto A (Last week's position: #10 // +8)
01. Gifty A (Last week's position: #4 // +3)
09. 4 of Diamonds C- (Last week's position: #9 // +0)
08. Ryan Lawrie C (Last week's position: #8 // +0)
07. Emily Middlemas C+ (Last week's position: #7 // +0)
06. Matt Terry B- (Last week's position: #2 // -4)
05. Sam Lavery B (Last week's position: #5 // +0)
04. 5 After Midnight B (Last week's position: #1 // -3)
03. Relley C B+ (Last week's position: #3 // +0)
02. Saara Aalto A (Last week's position: #10 // +8)
01. Gifty A (Last week's position: #4 // +3)
My bottom two: Honey G & 4 of Diamonds
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